-
Five Truths For Our Weary Souls
Two weeks ago, during a string of rough days, intrusive thoughts blared across my mind, leaving in their wake, a tear-stricken face and warped mind. I’m not sure what your hard season looks like—job loss, heavy-hearted loneliness, a difficult diagnosis, grief from losing a loved one, a broken relationship, anxious and depressive thoughts, an eating…
-
Because of His Death: “the old has gone, the new is here!”
Have you ever felt like spring’s beginning is just plain yucky? As we squelch through muddy backyards, wipe filthy dog paws, or dig in dirt to plant hopeful seeds, it is easy to focus on the dirt caked upon our shoes or underneath our fingernails. In doing so, we often forget the new creations breaking…
-
Is God Near When I Pray?
Do you ever struggle to pray in difficult seasons because you feel God is far away, so you don’t cry out to Him? God’s nearness is something I struggle to believe and feel, especially in difficult seasons. In His kindness, the Lord illustrates His nearness as I watch my daughter at the playground. I invite…
-
The Dawn of Spring: the Shepherd’s hope in our weariness
My gray and green shoes pound the sidewalk pavement, while my hand loosely holds the ridged black leash. Following this long leash to its end, you will find my white faced, golden haired miniature golden doodle. Anxiety is all-consuming today– pulsing between my shoulder and scapula, palpitating tension throughout my body. I cannot seem to…
-
Off the Bench: come to Jesus and find rest
My heart pounds in my chest like a pep band bass drum, setting a tempo too rapid for this occasion—sharing dinner with family and friends. In this moment, my body occupies a seat on the bench. The bench is a challenging place. I watch the game blur in front of me, wanting to join in,…
-
Hagar’s Story is Ours: Sought and Seen
The anxiety twinges, slowly, spreading painful heat and prickling across my shoulder. Our room is dark; my husband soundly sleeping next to me. It seems that the enemy knows in this moment I am all alone, and the sadness, shame, and unworthiness begin to creep up from my insides. This life is so hard. Fighting…
-
My View From Counseling
I know I need to go and I also really don’t want to—these thoughts hang simultaneously in the air. Does anyone want to voluntarily sign up to work through hard things with someone they don’t know very well? Definitely not me. I text a friend, please check in with me to make sure I schedule…
-
Like Velcro: trusting another with my dark thoughts
From thousands of feet in the air, I found myself looking down at the Indiana countryside, wind rushing past my face through an open airplane door. My palms wet with sweat, heart thumping, and legs trembling, I braced myself for what came next. “Okay, you have to jump!” the skydive instructor, who I was securely…
-
What’s on the Menu: When God’s Provision Comes in a Pill
Before I share my story, I know it is important to recognize that there are varying opinions about taking medication to relieve anxiety and depression. I encourage you to talk to a physician, psychiatrist, or counselor to figure out what is best for you. I am sharing my story because I want you to know…
-
Buoyant Beauty
What do you think of when you think of the word, beauty? Do you picture a model, a perfectly decorated home, or an influencer wearing the latest styles? Or maybe an ornately plated gourmet meal? Or a watercolor painting of a sunset? Beauty captivates, enthralls, mesmerizes, and inspires. I find that when I mindlessly scroll…
-
Where is Jesus in My Darkest Moments?
Do you struggle with day upon day of slate gray, dull, wintery days? You know, the ones where darkness creeps in before 5 PM? Me too. Honestly, I am deeply afraid of this season. The darkness of night often breeds opaqueness within my soul, where depression and anxiety lurk in the shadows, ready to pounce.…
-
Snowflakes of Grace
Slow day, snow day, surprise snowball in my eye day. Play day, reading day, it’s okay to take a break day. Cozy up, lay down, may we remember we are not lost, but found. Oh, how my heart needed the sweet serenade of these powdery flakes. Dancing lightly, falling softly, draping the lifeless wintry land…
-
How He Sees You
Do you ever feel alone, like no one truly sees you? Like you have no value or nothing to offer those around you? I have been there many times; in fact, I am experiencing one of those moments as I write these words in the school pick up line waiting to scoop up my daughter…
-
The Shepherd of Our Dark Valleys
Written in March of 2022 Feelings whirl within me, so forceful I might implode, broken and left for dead. Questions circle my mind like vultures, What now? How do I move forward? How do I live with this pain? How do I make sense of this and use my story? I slowly feel the familiar…
-
Refuge of Grace
The “why” behind my blog, Refuge of Grace. I desire to share about my journey of resting in God’s refuge of grace in the middle of the storm of depression and anxiety.